In what has to be one of the most ironic of life twists, none of my family or friends, and I mean no one who was raised with any kind or religious upbringing currently subscribes to that religion. Example: My best man Mark? 12 years of Catholic school. Now a sworn atheist. Staz? Southern Baptist upbringing. Now, doesn't subscribe to any particular religion. But she does believe in God. I think...
I always knew my Aunt and Uncle were very religious. Not Spiritual, Religious with a capital R. Evangelical Christians. And their way was the only way. I never really took it seriously. But I neglected to consider what that kind of strict upbringing can do to a kid. It shows up in the book frequently. And my cousins' disillusionment with the church and with certain Christians stems from that upbringing.
Now consider the flip side. My dad was NOT religious at all. He converted to Catholicism only so he could marry my mom, and never set foot in a church ever again. When I was 12, my mom decided to go back to church on her own. She asked if my brother Jerry and I wanted to come with her. We did. We wanted to see what it was all about. And it was fun. No one told us how rotten we were. No one told us we'd better shape up. We were told only that Jesus was about love, and acceptance, and trying to always do the right thing. And even if you didn't He was there to forgive. The ability to be imperfect was very attractive to me then as it is now. But back to my original point. Even when Jerry decided he didn't ant to go anymore, and I wanted to make him, mom said no. And it was just us two for a while. The end result: Both Jerry and me, and my mom are still practicing Catholics.
Now the REALLY flip side. My other siblings, the ones that wanted NOTHING to do with religion, or God, or anything related to the two, are now the most devout, occasionally annoying, Evangelical Christians you've ever seen. The change is so dramatic, sometimes it's hard to take seriously. But I take comfort in that they are not quite so exclusionary or 'God-fearing' as many are. My neices are being taught as I was. It's your choice. God is love. Be imperfect.
And the really tough part is that all of the strict religious parents really did just want the best for their kids. They just wanted to do what was right. They just went about it in the wrong way. And it's hard to hate them for that. So maybe you can't. You just love them for trying.